Why is it a constant struggle to listen to that voice in my mind and heart? I’m well into “middle age,” and my experience has taught me that I need to listen to that voice of reason, better, that voice of peace (at times seemingly ‘unreasonable!’) within.
Of late, I have been wrestling with a speaking engagement. When I was asked, I was taken aback, wondering, “Why are they asking ME to speak?” There was that quiet “inquietud” (unsettledness) in my spirit even then. But, I have a powerful mind, and I soon began to rationalize and examine the possibilities of why I was asked to speak. Is there something that I have, I know, that I really need to share with these people? Is there something here that will help both them and me to grow spiritually?
Two weeks later, and I’m still as disquieted by the situation…if not more so. Why do I resist that small voice within that says, “Jon, this is not the time and this is not the place.” Ahhhhh. Well, time has come to accept that voice…and to retire myself from the situation. Thankfully, there are still weeks before that speaking slot has to be filled…and so today I retire.
Why don’t I hear…no, why don’t I “listen!”…to that small voice, that voice of God’s Spirit gently guiding me? I have a feeling that it all goes back to that amazing egotism that pervades our being—that part of us that wants to be ‘in charge,’ and by golly, I’ll make my own decisions! Oh, the pain and carnage we could avoid if we would but follow the voice of peace within.
God help me to hear, to listen and then to act upon what I’ve heard. Amen.